Purpose

It's almost Thanksgiving and I've been working hard all semester. I even had trouble deciding not to go to the final Organic Chemistry lecture before the holiday. People miss class all the time and seem to be unphased and yet, I had to weigh the decision for a good half an hour before making up my mind to take a break. But wait, I just changed my mind again. Why do I feel like I need to do everything that's handed to me to the best of my ability? I couldn't even fathom not achieving the highest standard anymore. Sometimes I really feel burnt out from it all. Why do I continue? Why am I driven to do the things I do? Am I in control or am I simply finding new ways to blend in with the crowd? It almost feels as though I bury myself in my work to avoid looking at myself and trying to determine who I really am and what I want. However, I'm content to procrastinate on this subject as long as I achieve the results I want academically. Succeed now, ask questions later.